Scott Seare
Growing up in a loving and supportive family with three brothers, I had every advantage
to succeed. My Christian-based, family-oriented, financially successful goals and beliefs
positioned me well for success. I was active in social activities, academically
accomplished, and had meaningful relationships. Despite these positive factors, I felt
emotionally unfulfilled. I couldn’t shake the feeling that something was missing.
This created a complex duality when I found my solution through alcohol and using,
which were not conducive to my life. I had religion, family, education, values, etc., but
my emotional emptiness persisted. The initial ease and comfort of drinking seemed like
a solution, and I’ve sought that feeling continually. Step one in A.A. is to admit I was
powerless over my drinking (using), that my life had become unmanageable. I knew the
first half applied, but it took pain and destruction to accept my unmanageability.
I burned my life to the ground several times, failing to find a long-term solution. I filled
my emotional deficiencies with accomplishments, fitness, entertainment, social life,
relationships, family, possessions, but these were all temporary. The pain and despair I
constantly felt was unbearable, especially when seeing the eyes of loved ones as they
look to me for answers that I didn’t have. “How could you? Why would you do this
again?” The truth is that I had been asking myself these questions for years.
Recovery taught me that my problem wasn’t even the drinking or using, those were my
solutions and were very effective until they stopped working and the damage began to
pile. I suffered from alcoholism, a spiritual malady for which there’s only a spiritual
solution. I had to take simple actions that allowed me to live spiritually connected and
receive daily comfort from a “power greater than myself.” My testimony is that my power
comes from Heavenly Father and his son, Jesus Christ, whom I had mistaken for
religion all my life.
The atoning sacrifice of Jesus Christ granted Him the power to forgive, strengthen, and
provide me with the ease and comfort I had always sought. He is incredibly willing and
eager for me to have this, but he cannot give it to me; I must ask with gratitude and
humility. Everything I endured, the immense damage I caused, and the countless harms
I inflicted were necessary for me to surrender and receive this from Jesus Christ.
I was battling a battle that I could never win, and it wasn’t even mine to fight. Christ won
this battle for me long ago. I should have surrendered myself and turned this over to
Him rather than trying to obtain it myself.
I have learned that Christ’s way is simple: I must love to feel love, forgive to be forgiven,
serve to be served, humility is strength, surrendering is power. My best efforts only
brought misery and failure. Keeping this spiritual connection requires faith, gratitude,
humility, willingness, and I must share this with others. I was hopeless, if this has
worked in my life it could work in yours and you’re worth it. I am eager to help you
obtain this same solution when you are ready.
Scott Seare
